Free Online Jokes, Funny Free Jokes at Chat Place, Funny Jokes of the Day, Blonde Jokes - Funny free best and clean online jokes collection
Home |   Bookmark Us | Tell-A-Friend |   Add Url |       

Changing of the English Language - Miscellaneous

Home | Most Visited Jokes Add Joke | Top Rated Jokes A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

Changing of the English Language
Categor Miscellaneous
Total Hits 255
Rating
Total Comments 0
The Joke
Changing of the English LanguageHaving chosen English as the preferred language in the EEC, the EuropeanParliament has commissioned a feasibility study in ways of improvingefficiency in communications between Government departments.European officials have often pointed out that English spelling isunnecessarily difficult - for example, cough, plough, rough, through andthorough. What is clearly needed is a phased programme of changes toiron out these anomalies. The programme would, of course, beadministered by a committee staff at top level by participating nations.In the first year, for example, the committee would suggest using 's'instead of the soft 'c'. Sertainly, sivil servants in all sities wouldresieve this news with joy. Then the hard 'c' could be replaced by 'k'sinse both letters are pronounsed alike. Not only would this klear upkonfusion in the minds of klerikal workers, but typewriters kould bemade with one less letter.There would be growing enthusiasm when in the sekond year, it kould beannounsed that the troublesome 'ph' would henseforth be written 'f'.This would make words like 'fotograf' twenty per sent shorter in print.In the third year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expektedto reash the stage where more komplikated shanges are possible.Governments would enkourage the removal of double letters which havealways been a deterent to akurate speling.We would al agre that the horible mes of silent 'e's in the languag isdisgrasful. Therefor we kould drop thes and kontinu to read and writ asthough nothing had hapend. By this tim it would be four years sins theskem began and peopl would be reseptive to steps sutsh as replasing 'th'by 'z'. Perhaps zen ze funktion of 'w' kould be taken on by 'v', vitshis, after al, half a 'w'. Shortly after zis, ze unesesary 'o kould bedropd from words kontaining 'ou'. Similar arguments vud of kors be aplidto ozer kombinations of leters.Kontinuing zis proses yer after yer, ve vud eventuli hav a reli sensiblriten styl. After tventi yers zer vud be no mor trubls, difikultis andevrivun vud fin it ezi tu understand ech ozer. Ze drems of the Guvermntvud finali hav kum tru.
Rate this joke
Send this joke to your friends
Your Name :     :
Friend #1 email :
Friend #2 email :
Friend #3 email :
Friend #4 email :
Friend #5 email :
Leave your comment for this joke
Your Name *:
Email Add *: 
Website        :

Enter your comment
 
Enter the image below :

Comments for this joke
Joke categories

  • Animal Jokes
  • Animal World
  • April Fools Jokes
  • At Work
  • Aviation Jokes
  • Bar Jokes
  • Blonde Jokes
  • Blonds
  • Business Jokes
  • Camping Jokes
  • Celebrities
  • Children
  • Christmas Jokes
  • Clean Jokes
  • Comedian Jokes
  • Common Jokes
  • Computer Jokes
  • Computers
  • Computing Jokes
  • Dirty Jokes
  • Doctor Jokes
  • Drunks
  • Dumb Jokes
  • Elderly
  • Elderly Jokes
  • Ethnic
  • Ethnical Jokes
  • Farming Jokes
  • Festival Jokes
  • Food Jokes
  • Foreigners
  • Free Jokes
  • Funny Jokes
  • Gender Jokes
  • Golf Jokes
  • Instrument Jokes
  • Irish Jokes
  • Job/Office Jokes
  • Kids Jokes
  • Language Jokes
  • Lawyer Jokes
  • Legal
  • Marriage Jokes
  • Medicine
  • Men
  • Men Jokes
  • Military Jokes
  • Miscellaneous
  • Mixed Jokes
  • Mom/Dad Jokes
  • Other Jokes
  • Ouch
  • Police Jokes
  • Political Jokes
  • Politics
  • Practical Jokes
  • Real Jokes
  • Red Indian Jokes
  • Redneck Jokes
  • Relationships
  • Religion
  • School
  • Science
  • Situations
  • Sport Jokes
  • Sports
  • Stats/Math Jokes
  • Travel
  • Travel Jokes
  • War
  • Women
  • Women Jokes
  • Yo Mama Jokes
  • More Jokes
  • Copyright © chat-place.org

    For safety purposes, You are advised not to give out any Personal Information (i.e. Address, Phone Number, etc.) while on IRC. Because IRC is a Live Chat,The #1 Teen Chat Place can not take responsibility for any content seen by minors. If you feel offended by any content in the channel, please request Operator assistance for help with the matter. And don't forget to Bookmark this page so you can come back later.


    Best viewed at a minimum resolution of 800 x 600 using Internet Explorer 6 or higher 
    Copyright 2001 - 2008 Chat-Place.org All rights reserved.

    Thank You, Enjoy and have fun!