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Heaven and hell jokes
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The Joke
One day while walking down the street

a highly successful executive woman was tragically hit by a bus and
she
died. Her soul arrived up in heaven where she was met at the
Pearly
Gates by St. Peter himself. "Welcome to Heaven," said
St.Peter. "Before
you get settled in though, it seems we have a problem.
You see,
strangely enough, we've never once had an executive make it
this far and
we're not really sure what to do with you."


"No problem, just let me in." said the woman.

"Well, I'd like
to, but I have higher orders. What we're going to do
is let you
have a day in Hell and a day in Heaven and then you can
choose
whichever one you want to spend an eternity in."

"Actually, I think
I've made up my mind...I prefer to stay in
Heaven", said the woman.


"Sorry, we have rules..." And with that St. Peter put the
executive
in an elevator and it went down-down-down to hell. The d
oors opened and
she found herself stepping out onto the putting
green of a beautiful
golf course. In the distance was a country club
and standing in front of
her were all her friends - fellow
executives that she had worked with
and they were all dressed in evening
gowns and cheering for her. They
ran up and kissed her on both cheeks
and they talked about old times.
They played an excellent round of
golf and at night went to the country
club where she enjoyed an
excellent steak and lobster dinner. She met the
Devil who was actually
a really nice guy (kinda cute) and she had a
great time telling
jokes and dancing. She was having such a good time that
before she
knew it, it was time to leave. Everybody shook her hand and
waved
good- bye as she got on the elevator.

The elevator went up-up-up
and opened back up at the Pearly Gates and
found St. Peter waiting
for her. "Now it's time to spend a day in
heaven," he said.



So she spent the next 24 hours lounging around on clouds and
playing
the harp and singing. She had a great time and before she knew
it her 24
hours were up and St. Peter came and got her.


"So, you've spent a day in hell and you've spent a day in heaven.

Now you must choose your eternity," he said.

The woman paused for
a second and then replied, "Well, I never thought
I'd say this, I
mean, Heaven has been really great and all, but I
think I had a
better time in Hell."

So St. Peter escorted her to the elevator
and again she went
down-down-down back to Hell. When the doors of the
elevator opened she found
herself standing in a desolate wasteland
covered in garbage and Filth. She
saw her friends were dressed in
rags and were picking up the garbage
and putting it in sacks. The
Devil came up to her and put his arm around
her. "I don't
understand," stammered the woman, "yesterday I was
here and there was
a golf course and a country club and we ate lobster
and we danced
and had a great time. Now all there is a wasteland of
garbage and
all my friends look miserable."

The Devil looked at her and
smiled. "Yesterday we were recruiting you;
today you're staff."
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